My obsession with seltzer water has reached critical mass. Send help.
(But the colors! They’re so cheerful and spring-like!)
My head is just all over the place these days, and I owe it to exactly one thing – volunteering. I know I sound like a broken record lately, but truly, volunteering for the Red Cross is possibly the best thing I could have ever done. I’ve spent most of my days over the past few weeks just grinning like a total idiot, all the time. I have no idea why I’m so darn happy, but it’s like when the Grinch’s heart grew three sizes – not to sound completely corny, but it feels like I’m being thawed from the inside, or that my heart muscles are actually expanding in my chest. For all I know, I’m due for a heart attack and it’s not a good thing, but it feels friggin’ incredible. I spend most of my waking hours either taking training or attending meetings (after work), or thinking about the training sessions I’ve taken and the meetings I’ve attended (while I’m in the middle of work calls, which is totally throwing my mojo off). I’d estimate that my brain is now powered by 80% volunteer stuff, 10% work stuff, 5% food stuff, and 5% gym stuff. I even skipped a volleyball game to attend a volunteer meeting last night, which would have been unheard of just a year ago.
Part of why I’m so obsessed with this whole thing is the people I’ve met. I know I’ve said this before, and it’s reinforced every single time I come in contact with my teammates – these are the absolute best people I’ve ever met. It’s such a relief to finally meet people who think like me, and who are considerate, and who hold some of the same beliefs as me – not necessarily religious or political beliefs, but beliefs about how humans should interact with each other. They are exceedingly polite, so much so that I sometimes feel like I’m a jerk when I try to politely decline a ride home (for example). I’m so used to going out of my way to not inconvenience other people that it’s hard for me to accept when people genuinely want to do nice things for me. Weird, I know, but that’s how my crazy little head works.
In particular, there’s one fellow volunteer I seem to be connecting with so strongly that it’s scaring me a little. It’s been bothering me for the past week – there’s been something about this person that terrifies me, but we have so much in common… and then I realized it last night. This person is me, in about 20 years. She’s a transplant to Pittsburgh and her apartment (or house?) is less than a block away from where my first non-college Pittsburgh apartment was located. We have the same political beliefs, the same religious beliefs, the same life beliefs in general. We have similar personalities, and we both seem to have startlingly similar experience in terms of relationships. She insisted on giving me a ride to my car last week after a training session – not a ride to the bus stop (which is never necessary, but is always a very welcome offer), but actually to my car. She lives just a neighborhood away from where I park, so she drove past her house and through some scary parts of town in order to not let me get on the bus at night. Last night she again tried to insist on driving me to my car, but not wanting to make it an expectation, I declined and instead walked to the bus stop and then walked to my car when the bus broke down two stops away from my stop. That’ll teach me to refuse a ride. But really, she’s just one example of the people I’m meeting – the type of people who insist on going with you not just part of the way, but all the way. And when the bus broke down last night, and I had the option of waiting 20 minutes for a new bus, or walking nearly two miles through Homewood and Wilkinsburg after dark to get to my car, I opted to walk because I realized that I now have friends who listen to emergency scanners on the reg and who would care if something happened to me. (Granted, having friends who listen to scanners wouldn’t actually prevent something bad from happening to me, but it comforts me to know someone would actually care.)
Anyway, I’m completely off-track… which is how every day seems to be going. It’s just so nice to be stupid amounts of happy, so effortlessly. I’ll shut up now. 🙂
- Currently Reading: Dark Places, by Gillian Flynn. I’m about halfway through and I can guess the general direction it’s going in, and I have a hunch about how it’s going to end, so I’m curious to see if I’m right. I might have some extra free time this weekend, so I’m hoping I can finish this one before next Friday.
- Currently Eating: I made Hawaiian-style pork loin in the slow-cooker earlier this week, so I’ve been eating that over brown rice for a lot of my meals. It’s actually pretty tasty. I’m always surprised when pork tastes good.
- Currently Craving: I got my fish fry last Friday, and it just didn’t do the trick. I think I’m going to have to do it myself to have it the way I want it. So tonight, I have some fish thawing out and I might do some experimenting. I’d recently made a miso cod that was outstanding, but I really feel like a flavorful beer-batter is in the cards for tonight’s dinner.
Otherwise… that’s it. Aside from sleep, no real cravings for anything else these days.
- Currently Loving: Just… everything these days. Like I said, I’m stupid amounts of happy, for seemingly no real reason. I think my work friends are starting to think I’m on drugs. The other bartender has asked me numerous times over the past few weeks why I’m so darn giddy, and I just don’t have a good reason. Maybe someone’s spiking my coffee in the morning when I’m not looking? (<– I WISH.)
In other news of things I’m loving, I saw this story earlier this week. The link tells the story of a woman in Massachusetts who won $200 on a scratch-off lottery ticket, and then turned around and gave that $200 to a homeless man she met on the street (not in cash, necessarily, but in lodging, coffee, etc.). I watched a video about this, and then read the woman’s Facebook posts about it, and I’m kind of a little speechless. I typically try to put myself in other peoples’ shoes; empathy is my strong suit. I thought about what would happen if I were to win $200 on a lottery ticket, and what I would do with that money… and the truth is, I’m just not that good of a person to give it away. I want to be, but I’m not. That money would have gone directly into the nearest ATM, and then into my savings account. Do I need the extra $200 more than a homeless person? Absolutely not. But dangit, I just can’t get my head around giving away a sum of money that large at this point in time. I’m just not there yet. File this under: needs work.
- Currently Anticipating: Last weekend when I was on-call, I didn’t get a single disaster call – this was both bad (I didn’t get to actually “train” on anything) and good (no disasters is obviously a good thing). This weekend, I’ve signed up for two shifts, so I’m cautiously optimistic that I might see a little action.
We don’t have a wedding to work this weekend, but we have another event Saturday afternoon instead. This leaves my Saturday night unexpectedly free (or it might, depending on if I get called out), which is nice. Aside from being on-call, I have no idea what I’m going to do with my time. Last Sunday I cleaned while I waited for a call that never came. I can’t have that much cleaning in my house; people will start to get the wrong idea about me! This is a nice problem to have, though.
My next trip home to see the puppies is tentatively scheduled, although it’s not for a couple more weeks. I’m already so excited to see their furry little faces! 🙂